When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change
ourselves. ~Victor Frankl
This is what describes my past year the most...change.
Many things in my life happened last year that really took me off guard "unexpectedly" -too many to list, although tough to deal with and some pretty hard to swallow.... hence I lost myself.
For over a decade I have amerced myself in fiber, from custom knitting, knitting teacher, creating children's sweaters from recycled sweaters, spinning art yarn, dyeing yarn etc.
I saw it all coming to an end.
Like Forrest Gump ...after running across the US so many times ...one day he was just finished.
I was finished
Done with wool fiber...the pain of spinning and knitting made it also a pretty easy decision.
Home schooling came to a halt last year as well- tough one.
Something that had been also part of my life for over a decade-
gone.
It was time.
It was wonderful, creative and such a blessing to connect and bond with my children
and give them a safe environment to learn in.
But it was time for them to move on
experience other teachers and friends.
Feeling a sense of loss and mourning of what was...
I couldn't seem to go thru that door that life held wide open.
I really became depressed.
Deepak Chopra tells us to be human "beings" and not human "doings"...I get all that, but I feel alive when I create....
so when I get the remark "Why don't you relax?
- well, that is because I am relaxing when I do...create.
I get stressed out if I don't have projects going on- my brain is working.
Love that!
Searching etsy- websites, books, blogs seeking inspiration.
Realizing how afraid I was of trying something new-
putting myself out there
...what if I failed?
I just needed to take the blinders off and give myself a little time.
So lucky me
remembered her course that I took last year and how it set me on fire.
I needed to learn- not just do.
That was it.
***
I recommend her class to anyone out there that might feel like they are in a slump.
.... that is exactly what I need right now.
A little courage to be creative and try something new- and let other artists inspire me.
I am already feeling better.
I also missed blogging
in ways it documents the good things and maybe the not so good things in my life
sort of keeps me a little accountable for my days here on earth and what I do under the Big Sky.
Your sweet and positive feedback made me also realize that there is no pressure here-
Thank you!
It's just me
This is my little space in the world.
If it flows.... it flows.
If it doesn't ?
I guess it just doesn't.
I am learning to embrace change.
Change is good.
I can't knit any more...
but I have 2 amazing horses and have taken up dressage that I thought I would never do again- and now actually have the time for it since I am not homeschooling.
Funny how things work out...if you just let them.
Having an open heart.
I no longer feel like I am taking this old dusty road to no where.
Same old same old.
I am not who I was.
Exciting to make this a year of learning
exploring new things & new mediums.
Something I haven't done for well...a decade
- it's time!
Good-bye 2012
Hello 2013
~ I am to ready to bloom ~
